The Ordinary and Special Journey: Being an International Student at UMass Amherst
There are 3,514 international undergraduate students at UMass Amherst, and 1,677 of them are Chinese students. As one of the international students, I would like to share my stories and experience of living and studying at UMass Amherst.
Before my First Year
I came to UMass as a finance major. Back in high school, I realized that I am neither talented in liberal arts or science. I love reading and studying literature, but I did poorly on history and writing. I enjoyed learning biology and psychology, but never stopped struggling in physics and math. I couldn’t see myself passionately carrying a career related to either field, since my performance was not excellent in them. The few things that could make me sit down for hours and forget about time were my piano, drawing, and making vlogs, but I knew that these things are not going to be my college major. When my parents asked me what major I want to choose for college, I told them I was considering business since the only classes I was interested in high school were AP economics, plus I got five on the exams. After a few days, my mother convinced me to pick finance as my future major because my aunt once studied in this field and had a steady life after she graduated. I was excited even if I had no idea about what I would be learning as a finance major.
My mother also convinced me to join the summer Jump program after listening to the admission committee meeting in Beijing. She told me the program would help me adapt to a new environment earlier and make some friends before school officially started. When I brought up the tuition of the summer program, she told me not to worry about it because this is a worthy investment in education.
So I flew to the U.S. one month earlier than expected to join the summer Jump program and had the best possible pre-college experience I could get. The program involved Black history, ESL, and a seminar, and I learned so much from all of those classes. The Black history was very intense to someone who just graduated from high school and switched to a different country, like me. Although I learned English pretty much my whole life, I still struggled with having classes that are entirely in English. The class sessions were four hours long every day from Monday to Thursday, with compressed class material that was supposed to be taught in a full semester. Luckily, the class was small, and my professor was very patient with me when I brought up concepts I did not understand. I learned so much from that class and got an A at the end of the program.
The summer Jump also encouraged me to interact with people from different cultural backgrounds. At first, I was too afraid to speak in English because I knew I would be nervous and make the silliest mistake in the conversation. I was worried about being mocked for my accent and broken sentences, but my classmates were very friendly, and my PAs were nice. Thus I had friends to talk to and hang out with shortly after the program started.
After one month of studying at UMass, my first year in college seemed not that scary anymore. My main focus for this semester was general education, courses, and one 200 level OIM (operation and information management) course, so nothing related to my major yet. I adapted to the study environment better than I expected, and I made more friends that are different from me in every aspect. Three days before my semester began, I decided to add one theater class into my schedule to fulfill my general education requirement. I tried to choose theater as my major during high school application season, but my parents insisted on sending me to a business school. I started to think about having a theater minor, and this theater class could help me figure out if a minor in theater is the correct choice for me. Being the only international student in that class was hard. My confidence in English was low and and I still did not understand my professor sometimes, and I struggled to have a team working with my classmates. The cultural difference and lack of high school experience in theater switched me from an extrovert into an introvert. However, the course content was so interesting to me. I was introduced to different types of plays throughout history from all over the world, and all my obstacles became challenges to improve myself. My instinct told me that I should minor in theater and my second theater class which was a performance class later became one of my favorite classes. I also had another favorite class during my first year second semester. It was a 100 level class about health and disease, I learned so much about biology-related science and I was able to use the knowledge I built from this class into my day to day life.
First Year
My first-year dorm was in Gorman, which is located in the Central residential area. It has break housing and it is close to my classes and a dining buffet — which is one of the reasons for me gaining 10 pounds after that year. My roommate was also a Chinese student. We met each other through the UMass WeChat group during the spring of our high school graduation year, and we were also roommates during the summer Jump. We got along with each other very well and shared a lot of similar interests and thoughts, and we even traveled to Orlando during spring break. The trip was one of my most memorable experiences. Traveling to somewhere completely new and different with very close friends was my high school wish after graduation. It happened a little late, but I was glad to have this beautiful trip with my friend. We stayed close friends even after we moved to different off-campus apartments.
I got my first paid job in the spring semester. Growing up as a single child in a Chinese middle-income family, I am deeply grateful and guilty about studying abroad from China. I understand that if they were not sending me across the world to study, my parents would have a more enjoyable life and travel to different countries every year. I wish I could do something to make this up to my parents and get pocket money by myself to ease the financial burden. I decided to work in the UMass dining hall since I can only have a campus job, and I could start working as soon as possible. I had three shifts every week, for a total of 10 hours per week. My job was simple, whether serving ready-made meals on the line or preparing food in the back kitchen. I was happy with my job, and I have to work as much as possible to make up for the high cost of my Thanksgiving and spring break trips. When I went back to China during summer, spending my months in an English education studio tutoring younger teenagers, I realized that I like to work in an environment that involves communication. Helping younger students review their class material and helping them to develop their interest for future college made me feel useful, and I want to have a job in a similar environment in the future.
Sophomore Year
The first thing I decided for my sophomore year was to start living off campus. I was excited about the idea of having a bigger place, and needing to take care of myself from every aspect. I asked my roommate if she wanted to join me. She decided to stay on campus, so I became roommates with two other Chinese students. The first month after I moved into our new apartment was a disaster. The food I cooked was tasteless and not comparable to the UMass dining; many classes and work shifts I joined late or missed due to the bus schedule and traffic. Everything was so new to me and sometimes I doubted if I could make it through my college years without breaking down. But ever since I got used to my new environment, things began to get much better. I made more friends who have a similar living situation as me, so we could talk about the joy of our lives and discuss housing problems. I also stayed in touch with friends who live on campus, having lunches or dinners together, and exchanging stories and experiences.
I had huge pressure with my intensified academic schedule. If my first year could be described as fun and easy, my sophomore year was bumpy and rough. To make up for my mistake of having too few classes in my first year, I took six or more classes for later semesters. I had four business classes and two theater classes, which meant endless projects, exams, and papers. The accounting class and the law class almost put me into a depression because no matter how hard I studied, my exam scores were not ideal. I became friends with my TAs after asking for help on my homework so many times. And I finally got two A- as a result of my extra effort in both of the courses. I still haven’t started finance course yet, but I got a better view of the Isenberg School of Management from the courses I was taking. One of my friends told me about the real estate program; in the same semester, my theater performance course instructor, Vishnupad Barve, asked me if I want to join his last production before graduating with a Ph.D. I signed up for both without expecting that they would change my vision for my future.
I didn’t go back home that winter because the break was short and the flight could be a big expense. I told my parents I wanted to save their money and go back during summer. Christmastime was pleasant It was cozy and warm, which made me feel less homesick since I was spending time with my boyfriend and his family. We took a short trip to New York after New Year's Day to visit the museums and Broadway shows. I felt like I never actually enjoyed New Years before this time because my final exams would happen two weeks later, and celebrations seemed so irrational and unfitting. The one during my first year was nothing special as well, since I stayed at home watching the New Year's concert when my parents went to work as busy doctors and my other Chinese friends stayed in schools for their finals.
After the trip, I stayed in my apartment most of the time during the break reading books and drawing random stuff, and started my second sophomore semester two weeks later. It was a special semester for me. I rehearsed in a real theater show for the first time, and my experience persuaded me to confirm my second major in theater. I also discovered my interest in real estate, and it helped me to determine my focus for graduate school.
The rehearsals were inspiring and intense. I rehearsed two to four hours a day, five days a week in two months. We usually have a short discussion after each rehearsal to talk about discoveries for the play, and inform each actor's weakness on performance. I started as a girl who felt shy and unconfident performing even in front of other cast members, but then fell in love with the feeling of being on stage in front of hundreds of people as different characters. I realized that I wanted to have more opportunities to experience different kinds of life through the form of acting. I would love to learn about the various aspects of life in theaters and plays, so I went to the theater department one afternoon before my rehearsal, and declared my theater major with a performance concentration.
The real estate class was a big challenge for me at first. Sitting in the class and trying to keep up with all the unfamiliar terms and concepts made me doubt if my choice for this class was right or not, but the more I learned from this class the more I felt sure about my decision. When I worked on my first project on real estate I felt like I was working in the real world for the first time. Not just the fancy concepts and complex excel formulas, I was working on properties that could have been someone else’s house or company building. I could make myself a useful person for society if I keep participating in this in the future.
I also got involved in the International Program Office’s Zoom greeting with Chinese high school students. My friend who already got in touch with the office invited me, and we shared our experiences and feelings about studying at UMass during the Zoom call.
The semester became my favorite one as I was passionate about things I did most of the time. My schedule was packed with classes, rehearsals, and work, but I enjoyed every minute of it. Unfortunately, this productive semester only lasted for two months. It ended right after the last show of the theater production, and my life got completely changed. At the beginning of the quarantine, I was terrified of going anywhere, including the grocery stores. I downloaded the grocery delivery app Instacart and didn’t need to do groceries on my own. I felt depressed as well after knowing that I couldn't hang out with my friends, and most of them went back home to other states and countries.
With the rise of COVID-19 cases, in-person classes canceled after spring break, and UMass students and faculties became UMass Zoomers. I wasn’t prepared for the online classes at first, and I had such a hard time concentrating on lectures. But later when my brain understood that there wouldn’t be many changes for the current situation in a short time, it compromised and began to accept the situation. I started to see more advantages of having online classes. The class recordings help me with the parts I didn’t understand or missed. Instead of spending time getting dressed for school and taking buses, I had some extra time to do things I did not have time to do before. I got a painting set and some baking tools so my apartment was full of the mixed scent of freshly baked pastries and the smell of the paint and linseed oil, and the number on my scale crept up.
When summer break began, nothing really changed much for me. I would still paint, bake, read, and take walks with my roommate or my boyfriend. The only difference was that I did not need to worry about deadlines for exams. I thought about going back to China, but the flight tickets were unnecessarily expensive, plus buying them was like playing the lottery, which means the flight could get canceled anytime. I talked to my parents, and we all agreed about me staying in my apartment in the U.S. and eliminating the expense and risk of travel. With the guilt of seeing the amount of money in my bank account shrinking over time, I tried to find a job or internship since the quarantine started, but I couldn’t. I looked into LinkedIn and Handshake several times a day, filling out applications for positions that might provide CPT for international students, but nothing came out. I lost my job in the school restaurant too because the restaurant stopped hiring students for safety concerns. I applied to be a PA for the summer program, but the program didn't happen because of the pandemic. At the end of the summer break, I received an email from a friend who worked for UMass Undergraduate Admissions Office for several years. He told me there was an open position in the office, and the position requires making videos and blogs for promoting our school. It was a perfect chance for me because I had so much experience and interest in making vlog videos and I always wanted to show people how amazing my school is. I applied for the job without hesitation and felt so honored to get accepted.
Junior Year
I moved to another apartment one week before the semester began. My new room is more spacious and cheaper than my old one since we had three people to pay the rent of a two-bedroom apartment. It took us a while to settle things down with one roommate who left the apartment, and I learned that a roommate could become a friend, but a friend sometimes can't be a roommate.
After roughly three months of having no classes, having schoolwork again felt strange, not to mention it’s a fully remote semester. I missed the feeling of listening to my instructors in a real classroom and having classmates around, and I felt myself isolating from my peers and the outside world. I have one in-person theater lab. It is a theater design lab, and it separates the students into two groups and two sessions, so it won't have more than 10 students at each session. Normally I would be worried about staying with people that are not my roommates or my friends during this quarantine period, but UMass requires everyone in the community to do the COVID-19 test twice a week, so my concern was mitigated. I appreciated the opportunity the lab gave me to interact with people face-to-face, even with a mask.
A couple of weeks after the semester began, I found a way to balance my life during quarantine. I made plans of what I want to do every day and what short term goals I need to achieve each week. I scheduled myself to work six hours each week for my job at school, and finish my academic assignments as soon as possible so that I can spend some time during my weekends going hiking with my boyfriend, painting with my roommate, and calling friends through Zoom. To fix my nostalgia, I call my parents two to three times a week to chat about our experiences on opposite sides of the world. It’s pleasant to know what’s going on in my parents’ lives, especially knowing my father finally quit smoking after 20 years. I received two packages from my mother after the quarantine started. The first one was a bunch of medicine for cold and stomach problems, along with 150 face masks and 100 pairs of one-time-use gloves My mother sent it immediately after hearing about the quarantine, and the package traveled for two months and finally reached my doorstep. The second package had four pairs of short boots from my mother's favorite shoe brand. She insisted on sending those shoes by saying that they are the most comfortable boots in the world. She also claimed that if she didn't send me those shoes, she would feel sad knowing that I would buy unfitting shoes to save more money for books and rent. She is probably right.
Since the semester had no holidays or Thanksgiving break planning in the schedule, it felt like the time flew by. It's nearly the end of the semester, and winter has nearly arrived at Massachusetts again. Christmas and New Year will be different this year without too many people around, but they will be unique and special. Next semester will still be fully remote, and I felt ready to continue my life and studies in this strange but familiar situation.